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I Don't Know

by J Lind

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1.
I Don't Know 04:20
Skin like leather, stretched and weathered Can’t say whether sun or smoke Hair to shoulders - this man is older But still younger than I know And I will fall asleep while he lies down Beneath a streetlight on the edge of town And though I try to rest, my conscience screams I hear his mother whisper in my dreams, “Just because you need a savior doesn’t mean you’re just a sinner Just because there is a loser doesn’t mean there is a winner And sometimes the right answer is ‘I don’t know’.” Skin is snow white, as chemicals fight To keep the white light at an arm’s length Hair is all gone, but still it’s too strong And she’s too young to go this way And I will fall asleep while she falls through, Between the lab coats in a sterile room And though I try to rest, my conscience screams I hear her father whisper in my dreams, “Just because you need a savior doesn’t mean you’re just a sinner Just because there is a loser doesn’t mean there is a winner And sometimes the right answer is ‘I don’t know’.” And I am screaming at the dice “Why’d you roll that way?” And I am pleading with the night, though it might be in vain So I will sing the only thing that I can say - Just because you know the weather Doesn’t mean you know the season Just because you know a heart break Doesn’t mean you know the reason And sometimes the right answer - Just because we need a savior doesn’t mean we’re less than sinners Just because we may be losers doesn’t mean we can’t be winners And sometimes the right answer - Sometimes the right answer - Sometimes the right answer is 'we don't know'
2.
Fable 03:59
You might catch her riding high upon the waves Down in Newport, California You might catch her in Manhattan taking names Talking tough like a New Yorker You might catch her out in London drinking late Running a tab she can’t afford And the people say she’s living life the way That she should before she’s older For it is strange the way the river bends And she can’t know where it will lead I know she’d like to think it never ends But she would like to think a lot of things You might catch her driving east across the plains Passing Tulsa, Oklahoma You might catch her flying west over the states To her home in Arizona You might catch her hunting treasure out in Spain Searching castles in Segovia And the people say she’s living life the way That she should before she’s colder For it is strange the way the river bends And she has thrown away the map And she would like to think it never ends But she won’t know so let her row while she can She is heading down a road she’s never known But she will go while she is able She has lost her phone with no direction home But turning back’s not on the table You know you cannot keep an eagle in a cage Can’t keep a stallion in a stable So give her space and let her run her race And if she fails, make it a fable For it is strange the way the river bends And we don’t know where it will lead I know we’d like to think it never ends But we would like to think a lot of things For it is strange the way the river bends I think we all could use a hand I know we’d like to think it never ends But we don’t know so let us row while we can
3.
Enough 04:45
People have been talking, and they’re saying funny things They tell her who she is—who she is supposed to be She sees that they will define her by the head-turning words they’ve heard But they don’t understand that that’s not her Pride is an idol that is idling her dreams It says she’s a failure unless she does these great things like Win on Wall Street or run the country or finally find the cure But they don’t understand that that’s not her She is life that is lived with a fire in the heart She is passion and purpose and she won’t give up She is more than a name but less than the ones she loves Every day a heart beats, every day a heart stops Every day she loses a little of the life that she wants She is only human, and let that be enough Life is a tightrope and it’s hard to keep your feet It’s balance and progress, but it’s slow and in between—see Life is too short to take the fast road or live for less than you’re worth And if you know her then you know that that’s not her She is life that is lived with a fire in the heart She is passion and purpose and she won’t give up She is more than a name but less than the ones she loves Every day a heart beats, every day a heart stops Every day she loses a little of the life that she wants She is only human, and let that be enough People keep talking, but she’s not listening anymore People keep talking, but it’s about time she shuts that door People keep talking, but she’s not listening anymore People keep talking, but it’s about time she shuts that door People keep talking, but she’s not listening anymore People keep talking, but it’s about time she shuts that door People keep talking, but she’s not listening anymore She's not listening, she's not listening She is life that is lived with a fire in the heart She is passion and purpose and she won’t give up She is more than a name but less than the ones she loves Every day a heart beats, every day a heart stops Every day she loses a little of the life that she wants She is only human, and let that be— She is only human, so let her be She is only human, and let that be enough
4.
Born on a farm but he’d heard of far places The boy loved his home, but he knew all the faces He needed to leave, but his mother had begged him to stay Dreamt ‘til his dreams made his home seem foreign Sweat on his brow, but nothing else for him Broke his mom’s heart when he told her he must go today Gathered the gold for his work in the ground Bought the first seat on the last greyhound And drove ‘til the glow of the small town had started to fade But through his window he could still see the stars And somehow they seemed just a little less far So he slept like a babe as he dreamed of a place far away Among the stars, among the stars, May we never forget who we are Among the stars, among the stars, Among the stars Wandered the city, a face in the crowd The man would look up as the people looked down But stars can be harder to see over neon signs He jumped through their hoops, unaware of the danger The people cried “king” but the mirror mocked “stranger” Climbing each ladder, he only got sadder to find— That life at the top could be lonely and cruel The toys and the noise hid the stars from view So in a moment of rage, he threw off his cage and took flight Settled out west on the edge of the town Where the stars could be seen through the thickest clouds In a moonlit trance, he would dance in a natural light Among the stars, among the stars, May we never forget who we are Among the stars, among the stars, Among the stars The years passed by and the man grew old Silent and cold from the violence he’d known He’d weep as the people would bleed over nickels and dimes They’d kill over gods, they'd kill over colors Kill all their neighbors and then kill each other Broke his old heart to depart but he knew it was time Gathered the change from his pockets and boots Traded his name for a rocket and suit And flew for a year ‘fore he peered at the small earth from space But all he could see was a pale blue dot, Where the kings had been crowned and the wars had been fought So he threw up his hands and he wept ‘til he wasted away Among the stars, among the stars, May we never forget who we are Among the stars, among the stars, Among the stars Among the stars, among the stars, May we never forget who we are Among the stars, among the stars, Among the stars
5.
Grace 04:32
You get tired of running when your legs get sore And the road makes you wonder what it is you’re running for And the weight of each mile takes a toll on your smile When you don’t know what it is you’re running for You get tired of running when you can’t see the sun And the path lay before you, but the day is almost done And the burden you’re bearing is the weight of not caring When you don’t know what it is you’re running from So give me the grace to see when the light is dim And the hope to hold to in the wind When the road gets cold and the leaves fall on their own Give me the strength to stand when the feeling’s gone Give me just enough to make it home Give me enough to run when I don't know You get tired of running when it’s all been for show And the reason you’re running is that someone just said “go” But you’re willing to listen to that song in the distance When you don’t know what it is that you don’t know So give me the grace to see when the light is dim And the hope to hold to in the wind When the road gets cold and the leaves fall on their own Give me the strength to stand when the feeling’s gone Give me just enough to make it home Give me enough to run when I don't know So give me the grace to see when the light is dim And the hope to hold to in the wind When the road gets cold and the leaves fall on their own Give me the strength to stand when the feeling’s gone Give me just enough to make it home Give me enough to run when I don't know Give me enough to run when I don't know Give me enough to run when I don't know

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released January 3, 2017

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J Lind Phoenix, Arizona

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